Sterling Severns Bible Study, Romans, Paul's letter to, Rule of Life, Rule of Life Together

Adult Reflection Guide: Romans 3:1-20

Welcome!

We invite you to take some time to reflect on key themes from our recent sermon on Romans 3. Paul’s message in this chapter challenges us to look honestly at our own imperfections and embrace the transformative grace of God. Whether you choose to reflect on one or all of the themes, this guide is here to support your personal or group study. The goal isn’t perfection but to create space for spiritual reflection and growth.

Sermon can be found at marker 42:56

Sermon Summary

1. The Reality of Sin (Romans 3:10-12)
Paul reminds us that “there is no one righteous, not even one.” This statement isn’t about condemning us, but about leveling the playing field—no one can claim perfection. All of us are in need of God’s grace. This realization sets the stage for transformation, which begins when we acknowledge our own brokenness.

2. Judgment and Projection (Romans 3:9-10)
Paul critiques the human tendency to judge others while ignoring our own failures. Judgment often stems from insecurity, as we try to shift the focus away from our own shortcomings. Paul calls for humility—an honest self-assessment instead of focusing on others’ mistakes.

3. Grace as the Foundation for Transformation (Romans 3:20-24)
Paul emphasizes that the law was not given for us to boast about following it perfectly. Instead, it reveals how far we fall short, making room for grace. True transformation begins when we stop relying on our own righteousness and embrace God’s grace as the foundation for change.

4. God’s Faithfulness (Romans 3:3-4)
Even when humans are unfaithful, God remains faithful. This promise reassures us that our failures do not diminish God’s love or commitment to us. Knowing this allows us to confront our brokenness with honesty, knowing God’s grace will always meet us.

5. The Treasure in Clay Jars (2 Corinthians 4:7)
Paul’s metaphor of “treasure in clay jars” reminds us that we are fragile and imperfect, yet we carry something precious—God’s love and grace. Rather than disqualifying us, our flaws become opportunities for God’s power to shine through us.

6. Transformation Starts with Honesty
Paul teaches that true transformation starts with transparency. We don’t need to pretend we have it all together. Instead, when we admit our need for God’s grace, that’s when real healing and change begin.

Reflection Questions

These questions are designed to help you think more deeply about the themes from the sermon. Whether you reflect on them individually or with a group, allow them to spark meaningful conversation.

Facing the Truth: In the sermon, we heard the famous line from A Few Good Men: “You can’t handle the truth.” When faced with difficult truths about yourself, how do you typically respond? Do you tend to confront those truths or avoid them? Why do you think that is?

Judging Others vs. Judging Ourselves: Paul talks about our tendency to judge others while ignoring our own faults. How often do you catch yourself being critical of others instead of reflecting on your own struggles? How might shifting your focus to self-reflection change your relationships?

Paul’s Indictment and Our Hearing: Paul’s words might sound harsh or judgmental at first, but he’s speaking from a place of humility, acknowledging his own brokenness. How do you think your personal experiences or insecurities shape the way you hear challenging messages, whether from Scripture or others? How might it change your perspective to hear those words as coming from someone who is “in the mix” with you, rather than judging you from above?

The Nature of Sin: The sermon described sin as “missing the mark” and how it puts us out of sync with God. In what areas of your life do you feel out of sync with God? What would it look like for you to realign your heart and actions with God’s purposes?

God’s Faithfulness: Paul reassures us that even when we are unfaithful, God remains faithful. Where in your life are you struggling to trust in God’s faithfulness? How does this promise challenge or encourage you as you face uncertainty or failure?

Breaking the Cycle of Judgmentalism: We learned that judgmentalism often comes from a place of insecurity or self-loathing. How have you seen this cycle play out in your own life? What steps can you take to break free from judgmental thinking and move toward grace?

Sin and Projection: The sermon explored how we sometimes project our own discomfort by focusing on others’ faults. In what ways have you seen this dynamic in your own relationships? How might embracing vulnerability instead of judgment deepen your connections with others?

Transformation and Honesty: Transformation begins with an honest appraisal of our limitations and failures. Is there an area in your life where you’ve been avoiding the truth about yourself? What would it take for you to bring that into the light and experience God’s grace for healing?

Carrying God’s Treasure: Paul’s metaphor of “treasure in clay jars” was highlighted in the sermon. How do you see God’s grace shining through your own imperfections and weaknesses? What might it look like to embrace your vulnerability as a strength?

The Weight of Sin and the Law: We heard that the law reveals our need for grace rather than giving us a means to boast about our righteousness. How has your understanding of the balance between law and grace evolved? How does this shift in understanding impact how you live out your faith day to day?

Receiving Grace in Community: The sermon emphasized that none of us are exempt from the human condition of sin. How does recognizing your shared brokenness with others affect the way you engage with your community? How might it change the way you receive or extend grace?

Quotes for Reflection

Here are a few quotes to ponder as you reflect on the sermon’s themes. Use them as conversation starters or points of meditation.

  • “There is no one righteous, not even one.” (Romans 3:10)
  • “Judgmentalism is often rooted in our own insecurities. When we judge others, we are projecting our discomfort with our own sins.” — Richard Rohr
  • “Even when we are unfaithful, God remains faithful.” (Romans 3:3-4)
  • “Transformation begins with honesty—admitting our brokenness is the first step to experiencing God’s healing.” — N.T. Wright
  • “The principle of Transformation reminds us that nothing, no one, no situation is immune from the transforming love of God.” – Desmond Tutu
  • “The law shows us our flaws, but grace enables us to grow beyond them.” — Charles Talbert
  • “We carry this treasure in fragile clay jars, but it is in our weakness that God’s power shines through.” (2 Corinthians 4:7)

We hope this guide prompts meaningful reflection as you explore Romans 3 in your personal journey or with others in your community. Let this be a reminder that God’s grace meets us where we are and leads us toward transformation, not through perfection, but through honesty and love.

Additional Reflection Guides for Children & Youth:

Going Deeper: Exploration of Romans 3:1-20 with your Teen
Going Deeper: Exploration of Romans 3:1-20 with Your Children

Sources Cited

  • Wright, N.T. Paul: A Biography
  • Rohr, Richard. Falling Upward: A Spirituality for the Two Halves of Life
  • Talbert, Charles H. Romans: A Theological Commentary on the Bible
  • Peterson, Eugene. The Message (Paraphrase of Romans 3:10)
Sterling Severns Children's Formation, Rule of Life

Going Deeper: Exploration of Romans 3:1-20 with Your Children

Dear Parents:

Faith conversations with children can be full of wonder and curiosity. This guide is here to help you continue—or start—those conversations with your child about the big ideas we’ve been reflecting on Romans 3:1-20. The goal isn’t to arrive at perfect answers but to encourage your child to ask questions, reflect, and engage creatively. We want these conversations to be a fun and meaningful part of your family’s daily life.

As your family begins to build a “rule of life”—a shared rhythm that makes space for God—remember that this is a journey, not a sprint. You don’t have to use the whole guide at once. Here are some ideas to help spark creativity:

  • Pick just one question to explore this week.
  • Invite your child to respond through drawing or storytelling.
  • Think of a Jesus Follower your child enjoys spending time with. Maybe they can join in a conversation or share their thoughts.

Let’s take this journey one step at a time and enjoy the process!

Key Themes from the Sermon

1. Everyone Makes Mistakes (Romans 3:10)
We all make mistakes, and no one is perfect—that’s something Paul reminds us of in Romans 3. It’s okay to mess up. God knows we aren’t perfect, and He loves us no matter what. The important thing is to be honest when we make mistakes and trust that God will always help us start fresh.

2. God’s Treasure in Us (2 Corinthians 4:7)
Paul says that we carry God’s love like a treasure inside us. Even though we aren’t perfect, we are still very special to God. Like a clay jar with cracks, it’s sometimes through our mistakes that God’s love shines through us. God made us to share His love with the world, even when we don’t feel perfect.

3. We Are Loved Even When We Mess Up (Romans 3:3-4)
Paul also reminds us that when we aren’t faithful, God is still faithful. God’s love doesn’t depend on us getting everything right. Even when we make mistakes, God is always ready to forgive us and love us through it.

Reflection Questions for Children

These questions are meant to be fun, simple, and open-ended. Let your child share their thoughts and ideas. Feel free to add some hands-on activities like drawing or storytelling to make the experience more engaging.

  • God’s Treasure in Us: We learned that God’s love is like a treasure we carry inside us, even though we aren’t perfect. Can you think of something special you love that you’d want to share with a friend? How can you share God’s love with others this week?
    • Activity Idea: Draw a picture of a “clay jar” and talk about what treasures (like love, kindness, or friendship) God has placed in your heart.
  • Missing the Mark: Sin was explained as “missing the mark,” like aiming for something but not hitting it. Can you think of a time you tried to do something right but it didn’t go the way you planned? What did you learn from that? How do you think God feels about you when you make mistakes?
  • Feeling Loved by God: We sang Father Abraham in Sunday school, and it reminds us that we’re all part of God’s family. How does it feel to know you are loved by God, even when you make mistakes? What’s one way you can show someone else that they are loved by God too?
  • Making Mistakes and Being Forgiven: Everyone makes mistakes, and that’s okay! Can you think of a time when you made a mistake and someone forgave you? How did that feel? Remember, God forgives us too, and He helps us start fresh every time.

Spiritual Practice: Create a “Treasure Jar”

This week’s practice is hands-on and creative, designed to help children understand that they carry God’s love, even when they don’t feel perfect.

How to Do It:

  • Get a simple jar (or make one from paper) and label it “Treasure Jar.”
  • Throughout the week, encourage your child to put slips of paper in the jar with one thing they’ve done to show God’s love to others. It could be sharing a toy, helping a friend, or saying something kind.
  • At the end of the week, open the jar together and celebrate all the ways God’s love has shone through them.
  • Finish with a simple prayer: “God, thank you for helping us share your love with others. Even when we make mistakes, we know your love is always with us.”

Conclusion

Remember, these conversations are meant to be enjoyable and part of your family’s growing rhythm. Take it slow—there’s no need to rush through all the questions or activities at once. The important thing is creating space for your child to reflect and express their faith in their own way. As you build this “rule of life” together, celebrate the small moments and enjoy the journey.

Additional Reflection Guides on Romans 3:1-20

Going Deeper: Exploration of Romans 3:1-20 with your Teen
Adult Reflection Guide: Romans 3:1-20
Sterling Severns Devotionals, Life of the Community, Rule of Life, Rule of Life Together, The Right Next Step

Sacred Pause & the Path to Freedom

The past few days have felt heavy. Between the news cycle and the looming presidential debate, it’s hard to ignore the way tension creeps into our hearts. There’s a pressure that builds, a simmering frustration, and it doesn’t take much—a comment from a family member, a dismissive remark in a conversation—for that tension to spill over. I’ve felt it myself. It’s easy to snap back, shut down, or get defensive. These knee-jerk reactions often define us in ways we don’t intend—people may no longer see us as someone willing to listen or seek understanding. When our righteous anger shifts into self-righteousness, we can lose sight of the healing God is calling us to offer the world. But that doesn’t mean we’ve missed our chance. God’s grace meets us, not in perfection but in our efforts to return, pause, and try again. Each pause, no matter how difficult, is an invitation to step back into the work of healing—work we’re never disqualified from, no matter how many times we need to begin again.

This past Sunday, just before the benediction, I encouraged you to join me in practicing the Sacred Pause. It’s the space between what happens to us and how we respond. Lately, I find myself leaning into that space and discovering surprising freedom. When life throws us off balance, the Sacred Pause helps us stop reacting and start responding. As I mentioned, “Sometimes, after the pause, the response might be exactly what you originally wanted to say or do. The difference is that now your response comes from a place of peace and thoughtfulness, not frustration.” In that brief pause, we rediscover the freedom Christ offers us—not just from unhealthy reactions, but from the need to respond impulsively to every situation with anger or fear. Click here to learn how to practice the Sacred Pause.

Many great religious traditions embrace the importance of creating space between action and reaction. In moments when we feel overwhelmed by emotions, finding that space is critical to breaking the cycle of impulsive reactions. This pause allows us to reconnect with God and listen for the guidance of the Holy Spirit. I’ve been inspired by the broader wisdom found in the work of Viktor Frankl, a psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor, whose profound reflections on human resilience and choice offer insight for anyone navigating difficult emotional experiences. Frankl wrote:

“Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

Viktor Frankl

Frankl’s words resonate deeply with the Christian practice of the Sacred Pause. It’s in that pause that we make room for the Holy Spirit to guide us, allowing God’s voice to rise above the noise of our emotions. When we slow down and invite God into that space, we can respond not from fear or anger, but from a place centered in love, grace, and wisdom.

This practice reflects the liberation Paul speaks of in his letter to the Romans, where he encourages the early church to live in the freedom of Christ’s love rather than remain bound by division and conflict. And, in those moments where we struggle or fall short, we remember that God’s grace is always present, drawing us back into that space of transformation. Explore how you can incorporate the Sacred Pause into your daily life.

Returning to the World’s Tension

We live in a world brimming with tension, frustration, and conflict. In our own church life, we’ve felt it too—whether it’s during a difficult conversation in a business meeting or while serving in Community Ministry when impatience gets the better of someone. Perhaps you’ve encountered it on the road, stuck behind the guy with the offensive bumper sticker, or while watching a political talk show where contempt seems to be the driving force. These moments test our capacity to live out the love and grace we’re called to embody.

But here’s the good news: we’re growing together. Every time we lean into the Sacred Pause, we take one step closer to healing ourselves and the world around us. The Sacred Pause begins with us—giving God the space to transform our hearts. In that pause, we not only stop our own unhealthy reactions but also make room for others to be seen, heard, and transformed. When people feel understood, they too are invited into their own pause, to reconsider, and begin again. We may not always get it right the first time or even the second, but the love of God, always present and always at work, gives us the space to try again. And as we grow together in our faith, we get to participate in God’s healing project—a project that is grounded in love, grace, and reconciliation.

Together, as a church community, we have the privilege of being instruments of healing in a world that so desperately needs it. Let’s keep growing, keep pausing, and keep discovering the ways God is leading us to love more deeply, to listen more closely, and to heal more faithfully.

Yours in Christ,
Rev. Sterling W. Severns, Pastor

Going Deeper:

God has used many voices to help me grow in my faith, and Arthur Brooks has been one of them. If you’re interested in exploring more about the power of the pause, I encourage you to watch or listen to the conversation between Simon Sinek and Arthur Brooks at the 92nd Street Y, where they discuss the importance of pausing before reacting. You can find the interview here or listen to the podcast here.

John Gottman’s Four Horsemen—criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling—are harmful patterns that damage relationships, often arising when we react out of intense emotions. You can learn more about these patterns here.

Sterling Severns Life of the Community, Rule of Life, Rule of Life Together, Spiritual Disciplines, The Right Next Step

Spiritual Discipline: The Sacred Pause

Morning Reflection: Rediscovering the Freedom to Choose

As described in the article, “Sacred Pause & the Path to Freedom”, the Sacred Pause offers us the freedom that Christ gives—not just from unhealthy reactions, but from the need to respond impulsively in anger or fear. Begin your day by reflecting on the freedom found in Christ’s love and the grace available when we pause, listen, and invite God into our responses.

During the Day: Practicing the Sacred Pause

When you feel emotional or overwhelmed, practice the Sacred Pause by following these steps:

  1. Notice the Moment: Acknowledge when strong emotions arise, without rushing to respond.
  2. Pause and Breathe: Take a few deep breaths, giving yourself time to pause. This space helps you avoid reacting impulsively and invites God’s guidance to work through you.
  3. Ask Self-Awareness Questions:
    • What am I feeling right now?
    • Why am I feeling this way? (Is this connected to something deeper, like past experiences or emotions?)
    • What is God trying to show me through this feeling?
    • Is this a moment where I should respond now, or is God calling me to wait?
    • How would God want to respond through me in this situation?
  4. Recognize the Need to Wait: Remember that the Sacred Pause might lead you to wait for the right time to respond. Sometimes, waiting is part of God’s wisdom, allowing you to reflect more deeply before acting. Trust that waiting is an active, spiritual practice that creates space for God to guide you.

Evening Reflection: Journaling and Sharing

At the end of the day, take a few moments to reflect on your experiences with the Sacred Pause and consider these questions:

  1. Did I create space today to pause and respond thoughtfully?
    How did the Sacred Pause free you from reacting impulsively or defensively, as described in the article, “Sacred Pause & the Path to Freedom”?
  2. Were there moments when I forgot to pause and reacted out of emotion?
    Reflect on specific moments when you acted without thinking. Was it with a family member, coworker, or someone else? Did your reaction create a chain reaction, escalating tension or misunderstanding? This connects to the article’s message about knee-jerk reactions and their consequences.
  3. How did the Sacred Pause help me rediscover my freedom?
    Did the pause help you break a cycle of frustration? Reflect on the freedom from emotional reactivity that Paul describes in Romans and how this practice brings you closer to that freedom.
  4. What deeper emotions or past experiences might have influenced my reactions?
    Think about moments where your reactions were stronger than expected. Could this be connected to something from your past? This ties into the article’s insight on how deeper emotional or historical baggage can influence our reactions.
  5. In what ways did I experience or offer God’s grace today?
    Reflect on how you received or extended grace during your day. Remember that even when we fail to pause, God’s grace meets us, offering us second chances to begin again.

Hopeful Word on Second Chances

As the article beautifully states, “God’s grace meets us, not in perfection but in our efforts to return, pause, and try again.” Every time we pause, whether we succeed or fall short, we are offered the chance to begin again. No impulsive reaction, no matter how intense, disqualifies us from God’s work of healing and transformation. Each new day, each new moment, is an opportunity to pause, respond, and grow.

Going Deeper

For more insights on the power of the Sacred Pause, you can explore these helpful resources:

Sacred Pause & the Path to Freedom”: Discover how the Sacred Pause can help us break free from impulsive reactions.

Arthur Brooks in Conversation with Simon Sinek at the 92nd Street Y: Brooks and Sinek discuss the importance of pausing before reacting and how this practice fosters empathy and understanding.

Viktor Frankl’s Reflections: Explore Frankl’s insight on the space between stimulus and response, where our growth and freedom lie.

John Gottman’s Four Horsemen: Learn more about the damaging patterns that arise from reactive, emotionally charged behavior.